Meet My Lovely Neighbor
A lovely lady lives around the block. She sports the cutest French accent, is visually impaired, and looks great. I cannot tell her age exactly, but I believe she is in her mid-eighties.
She is a true ray of sunshine and when you say hi to her, you feel like the coolest kid on the block.
She recently lost her husband, and I wanted to show her my love and offer my support. Little did I know that what she would say would serve me as a much-needed breath of fresh air, or perhaps more like, pure essential oxygen in my parenting journey.
How is your parenting going?
As a parent, are you hitting it out of the park every chance you get, or are you doubting every step you take? Or do you find yourself in the middle, some days you completely kick-ass, and some days you have no idea what hit you?
As our children grow older and become teenagers, the time is ticking for us all. I recently turned 40, and I wrote my thoughts in this article.
We are also going through life changes, our priorities shift, and our perspectives widen. Guess what? The same thing is happening with our cutie pies.
Remember once upon a time when the decision of where should we send them to day-care or what kind of videos we will allow them to watch was our parenting dilemmas? Yup, good times!
Now, listen to my neighbor, she dropped a gem in a five minutes conversation…
So, I called my neighbor. It was the holiday season, and I wanted to see if she needed company.
To which she replied,
“Oh, Chany, thank you, but don’t worry, my children and grandchildren are around the clock making sure I am not alone.”
I was impressed and answered,
“That is amazing. I am sure this is a testament to how you raised them.”
However, my lovely neighbor did not receive my compliments freely. She answered me with utter self-awareness and humility, the kind only remarkable human beings are blessed with.
She said,
“No, my dear. I just got lucky. I love my children the way any parent would love their children. I am not any smarter, nor did I make better choices than anyone else. I know many amazing parents, and they weren’t as lucky as me.”
I was speechless. It was what I needed to hear at that moment.
I felt like she had the key to the inner chambers of my heart, a place that, as a single mother, is often locked away. She relieved doubts I did not have the courage to voice out loud.
These are the lessons I will forever take with me from that short conversation:
- I do not control what kind of human beings my children will be.
- Releasing control will alleviate my worries and anxiety about the future and not rob me of the joys of the present.
- The past I cannot change and I have no control over the future, so I better stay in the present.
- I will love and parent my children to the best of my ability. And that is the absolute best I can do.
- Ultimately, my children’s choices will determine what type of people they will become. And that’s forever evolving, so why worry now?
- If I strive to become a beautiful human being like my neighbor, maybe I will be as lucky as her.
What lessons did you learn from that story? What other stories has inspired your parenting?
I would love to read it in the comments below.
